Everything seemed fine at your last physical and you and your spouse are now trying to conceive a baby. This is such an exciting time! And after three months of trying, you’re still not pregnant.



What could be wrong? Why is this taking so long?

In the beginning the whole notion of getting pregnant seemed easy. Most of your friends are expecting. At family dinners or get together relatives are beginning to hint, maybe it’s time for you to consider children.

Trying to conceive can be a very stressful time for couples. At times it may appear that it is more stressful on the woman, but it can also affect a man and begin to take its toll on the relationship.

Each month has turned into a rigorous event of using ovulation predictor kits and learning the fine art of basal body temperature taking, upon rising each morning. During ovulation the “timed” lovemaking seems to become a chore and it just isn’t fun anymore. It has become a job. The timing and testing, as well as, having to schedule everything is getting old very fast. Does this sound like you and your spouse? If so, you are far from alone.

While doctors say that right now there aren’t enough data to draw a clear and obvious link, many believe it’s only a matter of time before we connect all the dots and see the bigger picture.

“What we do know is that when stress-reduction techniques are employed, something happens in some women that allows them to get pregnant when they couldn’t get pregnant before,” says Allen Morgan, MD, director of Shore Institute for Reproductive Medicine in Lakewood, N.J.
While the exact pathways between fertility and stress remain a mystery, Morgan believes hormones like cortisol or epinephrine — which rise and often remain high during times of chronic stress — play a key role.
Morgan says that it’s also possible that reducing stress may help enhance proteins within the uterine lining that are involved in implantation. She says that stress reduction may increase blood flow to the uterus, which also affects conception.

Stress affects the message the brain sends to your body when it is time to ovulate. When this happens, the sperms do not see any egg to fertilize at the end of the race.

The biggest objective is to try not to stress. Reducing stress is the key factor and you need to find ways to manage it. You can try taking up a new hobby. Just spending time with your spouse and reuniting without having to discuss baby making also helps. Plan a vacation, live out your fantasy or just cuddle up in bed. Many times with quality time spent together you will find yourselves being intimate for the sake of just being intimate.

By relieving stress your world will seem brighter and less tiring.  Learn to enjoy this time in your lives.  Life passes us by much too fast, and the day will come that you actually miss this time. It is a known fact that a percentage of couples will face stress when trying to get pregnant. It will happen quickly for some. For those who have to try harder and wait longer? It is well deserved in the end when you are holding your baby. What’s your favorite stress relief technique?


Debra Verville


(Illustration: Per Byhring/ScienceNordic)




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